The Morningstarr*

Mr Morningstarr* · 17-03-2008, 22:21

Ever heard this expression? If something is frustrating it's said to be like "nailing jelly to a wall". Well how frustrating is that? Let's find out!

First, to limit frustration I advise you assemble all tools and materials you think you will need. Top of the list is jelly, then hammer and nails and of course a wall. But I've thrown in a few extras too, moulds, gelatin and wood glue.

I'll not go through the fine detail of how to make jelly, in true Blue Peter style I had one of my minions make them earlier. First up was a regular bog standard red flavour jelly made to the manufacturers instructions and it came in a smashing butterfly mould. We were already off to a bad start though, the stupid thing wouldn't even leave the mould!

So that was jelly number one down the shitter already, there was a slight sense of frustration. Moving on to jelly number two, another bog standard red flavour jelly, this time in the shape of a train. After placing the mould in hot water the jelly wriggled out like a slippery eel and was ready for nailing!

As you can see, it takes three to hold the blasted thing, nail it and take a photo. This is quite clearly an impossible task for one man, but even working as a team the results speak for themselves.

The jelly splatted to the ground before we could even take a picture. Continuing in this direction was sure to lead to real frustration, so a change of strategy was required.

Step up jelly number three.

Jelly number three was reinforced with enough gelatin to make three pints of jelly, and was the shape of a teddy. As you can see nailing the bugger to the wall was a doddle even for one man, frustrating my arse!

However, we didn't stop there. Jelly number four was loaded with wood glue, the strongest glue around and made from the collagen of dead animals.

The initial result was a success, barely any frustration whatsoever. Sadly though within a matter of minutes the jelly tumbled.

Jelly number three is still in position, and I will give you an update in the morning to see if it lasts overnight. Loading your jelly with gelatin is a proven success to eliminating frustration when nailing a jelly to the wall. Factual fact.