F*** My Life

[Earl]

I've only just discovered this site, but it's a good laugh. If you like laughing at other people's misfortune that is!

http://www.fmylife.com/

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style postion was fun, it reminded him what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

[timey]

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style postion was fun, it reminded him what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

[Nic]

I am just reading the site. Some of them are But a lot are

[timey]

Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML

[Earl]

Today, my best friend, was crying because her boyfriend is a retard. I brought my thumb up to wipe a tear off her face, and somehow stuck it up her nose. FML

Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML

Today, I was with the guy I am seeing and I were fooling around in my room. I asked him if he wanted to have sex. He said he didn't have time because he had to go play Mario Kart. FML

[Nic]

Today, my friend had to leave work early for a funeral and on his way out I wanted to say something. All I could think of was "have fun". FML

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a Moderator, instead, I got banned. FML

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

[jezzi]

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a Moderator, instead, I got banned. FML

ah, i wondered why mickyboy had joined here

[Nic]

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a Moderator, instead, I got banned. FML

ah, i wondered why mickyboy had joined here

Awww bless him. thats who I thought of too

[Earl]

He isn't really banned is he???????

[jezzi]

Today, someone told me they liked my personality when i'm drunk. I asked, "what about when I'm sober?". "No, only when you're drinking." FML pmsl

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: “I’m keeping them just in case...”- “In case of what?”- “In case I want to dress up like an asshole”. FML

Today, I was looking at this site when my wife called to ask what I was doing, I told her I was looking at a website called F*** My Life and she hung up. I called her back and got yelled at because she thought I was using a website called F*** My Wife. FML

good site!