Weirdest question from your teacher

[Lee]

I don't know if this question belongs here or into the general section so mods, move this thread if necessary.

What was the weirdest question that you're teacher have asked you?

Mine is "When was the last time you lost your cool?"

[THE V0NZ]

Well it's a while ago now, but mine would have to be:

"Is it true what the other kids say about you Vonzy?" Miss Thompson, my petite, brunette, 30 something history teacher drawled huskily. We were alone - I thought it was harsh of her to give me a detention for not knowing what the noseguard of a Spartan helmet was called (in Greek), but as I was only 14, little did I suspected she had an ulterior motive - until now.

"Uh, I dunno Miss - what have you heard?" I muttered sheepishly, as she flipped open the second button of her muslin blouse and beckoned me towards the desk.

"I've heard them teasing you in the playground, making fun of your 'donkey cock' - is it really big Vonzy?"

She was down to the fourth button now - I could see her ample cleavage and dark areolas through her sheer pink brassiere. She fixed me with her gaze, her mouth slightly open. Something stirred within me - deep down - a mixture of fear and anticipation. It felt good.

"No Miss - actually it's tiny - barely big enough to piss through in fact. As for the behaviour of my peers, I'm sorry to say they are just being childishly ironic. I hope that doesn't put you off letting me scuttle you Miss?" I replied in chipper fashion.

"In your dreams, Pin-Dick! Now get lost!" she spat icily as she finished engaging the last duffle on her coat, and slammed the classroom door behind her.

[SFB]

"but as I was only 14, little did I suspected she had an ulterior motive - until now."

I suspected nothing until she gave me reason to suspect her ulterior motive?

[Earl]

Great post VONZ.

[THE V0NZ]

Great post VONZ.

Oh. Now I really wouldn't know about dat sort o ting sir.

[Earl]

Do you like Kipling Ted?

[THE V0NZ]

Do you like Kipling Ted?

It's ok, but only if I get a reach-round too, Sailor!

[Earl]

I don't recall that line from the Fast Show.

[bogmarsh]

Good one Vonz

Doubt that's what you had in mind when you asked that question eh, Lee?

[Victor29]

"Have you done your homework?"

Yeah, as if!